Ixchel, the Mesoamerican influence, South American Shamanism and Palo Santo 

I first learned about the Mesoamerican culture in my teens in history classes, when we were studying the Spanish armada and the Conquistadors. I also saw a program on the Discovery Channel and was hooked. I watched as many programs as I could, later turning to books – cenotes in particular fascinate me. I based a GCSE drama assignment on the Aztecs – something about an argument between the Sun God Huitzilopotchtli and the Moon Goddess Mitztli – I got to play Mitztli, complete with a big silver crescent moon tied to my head. I even went to an exhibition on the Aztecs in London and based an A-level art project on the statues I saw there. Quetzalcoatl, Xipe Totec and Coatlicue were particularly memorable. When I started exploring spirituality and opening up to Spirit I dreamed of two temples, and after trawling the internet I found out they were the Mayan temples of Tikal and Palenque. A few years ago the Mayan Goddess Ixchel seemed to come in a lot; never saying anything, but coming in during certain times of pain and making it known She was there. She is said to have founded Palenque.

When Loki came into my life three years were devoted pretty much solely to Him, Sigyn and Their family. While I wouldn’t take back those amazing years for anything it meant that I often didn’t give much attention to my other Beloveds. Since the upheavals that started in late February my attentions have gotten more diverse, and I’m engaging with more of my Beloveds. I’m also getting more coming back into my life.

Last month I had three instances in a week where Ixchel came up. I took the hint and reminded myself a little about her, and among other things She is a Goddess of childbirth (so connected with gestation and birthing in all senses), weaving, water and also of healing. I believe She is coming in to help me with my own rebirth, helping me with the deeper levels of healing and reintegration.

Here is a photo of my lovely Ixchel statue. She was created by Studio Lindy on Etsy. Ixchel came all the way from Australia, so She’s had a long journey to get to me. She even took a detour back to Lindy because Royal Mail decided they had a problem with the address, but she finally made it to me. She looks rather at home on my window sill.

I’m also being called back to my interest in Mesoamerican culture, and of South American Shamanism. I’m not going to start calling myself a Shaman, but the spirit of those practices calls to something deep within me, and has done for around 10 years. It’s something I learned a lot from before, and feel I can learn a lot from it again now.
This comes combined with a dream I had in May where I was buying a bottle of Palo Santo water. I had heard of the wood but hadn’t felt drawn to it before. Along with Ixchel and the Mesoamerican influence coming back in I took it as a sign that Palo Santo is something I need to work with. I remembered clearly the company’s logo I saw on the bottle in the dream, so I looked them up and lo and behold they sell Palo Santo water – I hadn’t looked at their website before, I’d only seen them advertised in a magazine I used to buy. They also had the essential oil (ethically sourced and harvested) so I treated myself to some, along with a sample piece of the wood for smudging. While browsing I came across a wooden egg-shaped rattle, and when I tried to click on the ‘more information’ link the page jumped (the signal on my phone is dodgy so pages don’t always load properly) and the egg rattle was added to my basket! I checked with Them through my pendulum whether this was just coincidence but no, I was supposed to have it. When I finally got the information loaded it said the rattle could be used for rebirth ceremonies – message received.

So here are my Palo Santo goodies:

The essential oil smells a little like Frankincense (Boswellia carterii) with a hint of pine and something more earthy. It’s really good for cleansing the aura of any negativity, attachments and untoward spirit influence. I’ve also found using a drop in each palm and then inhaling the scent to be very grounding.
I haven’t tried burning the wood yet but it has a lovely smell to it; woody, earthy and slightly sweet. It’s often used in cleansing rituals.
Unfortunately I cannot recommend this particular brand of Palo Santo water. It has additives in it and a fragrance that smells like aftershave. It is, however, still very effective in a cleansing bath.
I am looking up other options for Palo Santo water, but there aren’t many suppliers in the UK, and it is quite pricy. I may experiment with Palo Santo wood in vodka as a kind of tincture and water it down. I’ll keep you updated.

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Loki and Sigyn: facilitators for deep healing and Shadow integration

Loki and Sigyn by Michelle, Northern Tamarisk

If Sigyn is the Goddess of holding space (see previous post) perhaps Loki is the one who takes our hand and let’s us know it’s safe to open up. He is the one who encourages us to express our most vulnerable selves. All the while Sigyn holds the bowl, catching any poison and throwing it away. Together They are the ones who support us through the deepest levels of healing.

If there was ever a Deity suited to helping us heal our own Shadow it is Loki – He who knows His own, Who loves all His children; knows how to love the seemingly unlovable. He is also the one who calls out hypocrisy and the Shadows of the Gods Themselves. He is the one who helps us heal our deepest wounds.
When we are in our own caves, bound by things once dear to us, upon rocks of our own shame, Loki is there with us. He knows the agony, the torment, on a whole other level. But knowing the cave as He does He can help us through our own time in the Underworld. When our own Shadows, our own repressed selves, drip down onto us, tearing us apart, He is there. 

All the while Sigyn, compassion personified, holds us steady. She takes us in Her arms like She holds the bowl, letting the Shadow poison spill out, helping us to heal. She lets us know She’s there whenever we need Her again. She will always return to hold the bowl when needed.

What we need to hold on to during this process is that, somehow, Loki made it out of the cave. Somehow He was freed from the darkness, and Sigyn could finally rest Her strong but weary arms and heart. That means we can make it out of the darkness too. We can start to reclaim our lives, go out into the world and do what we’re meant to do. We are all the stronger for having been through our trials.

They are a partnership for deep healing. For how do we heal the Shadow? With understanding acceptance and compassion. Loki and Sigyn.

Shadows in the Dark

A contradictory title? If, like me, you’re currently ‘exploring’ the Underworld it may make more sense. My journey into the Underworld began in February, on the day my brother flew back to America. It was like some energy that had been stirred within when he arrived was suddenly unleashed by his departure. You see, in our family my brother is the trailblazer, the independent spirit who tries to shake us up and convince us to leave our safe cocoons. The Gods seem to be in agreement.

During this Underworld journey I have been in the dark about so many things. One after another old constructs, things and people I once held dear, and my safety net have been ripped away. While painful and sometimes terrifying in the empty potential they leave behind it has been my Shadow Self that has repeatedly reared its head.

Just when I feel I can catch my breath yet another dark, unlovable part of my Self arises, hungry for attention. Because I’ve pushed them down for so long, ignored or denied them, they have chosen very visible ways to make themselves known to me – most notably in communication with others.

While I like to believe I’m a good, honourable, ‘light’ individual I have had to face up to the fact that I can also – on occasion – be a darker, selfish, judgemental person. Not often, but boy have those Selves made themselves known in the last few weeks.

Yes, my Shadow Selves are having a field day,  rearing their heads like those whack-a-mole games you see at fairs or the pier. Continue reading